Resolution

Be prepared - I need to vent!

We've been a little cooped-up lately!

Sickness, projects, broken rig...

(see my poor sick baby)

Sometimes we get a little crazy and try to make up weird things to do around the house.

Like this new naughty trick!!!

So, since we need to just GET OUT and get social...I finally put on my big girl pants and made it happen!

We hit the YMCA!

Ok.  Getting everybody ready, fed, packed up, out the door, buckled in, dropped of at Mrs. Stone's, unbuckled, chased across a parking lot (which typically involves my britches falling down 20 times), entertained while waiting for aerobics, introduced to a brand new child watch environment, situated in there...blahh blahh blahh...is really no small task.  But that's all a total cake-walk compared to the stupid demons I have to fight off in my head!!!  The stupid "voices" that convince me that I'm already defeated before I even start.

Before I talk about demons I must say, I LOVE:

exercising

dancing

music

choreography

people

sore muscles

sweat

being in shape

smiling

rhythm

being productive

MUSCLE

So a dancercise class at the "Y" seems like a perfect fit right?

Oh, but wait!

My "demons" remind me that I DON'T love:

my 1990's workout clothes

My Don King fuzzy hair and un-showered appearance

my butt (and all other parts) jiggling in public

the fact that I'm incredibly out of shape

and overweight

feeling judged (I know I need to get over it)

My 10-year-old chunky cross training kicks

(cutting off my circulation because Carson swings them - like a rope - by the laces!)

or my squeaky crackling joints!

I know, I just need to get over it!

Mind over matter...mind over matter!

So I convinced myself to just go.

After all, I could stand in the back and modify moves so I wouldn't die...right!?

Since I have that weird "rules" personality (which makes choreographed dance just very decodable), lots of years of dance experience and even taught aerobics,

this gig is right up my alley!

I mean, it's not like I was setting myself up for major disappointment and failure -

like thinking I could schedule a running date with Cara Ravenscroft!

I DON'T run - I DANCE!  :)

So there I was, facing my jiggle fears, standing in the aerobics room!

(On a Monday - haha!)

If you've ever been to aerobics, you know there's usually at least one lady who's a total regular/diehard/overachiever!  She has her "spot" and she knows her stuff!  Well, I should've known - when she turned around, politely introduced herself with a big smile, and told me not to get discouraged with the complexity of the routines - that I was majorly screwed!

So the music begins and...

how do I even explain it?

It felt like16 counts worth of moves into 8 counts of music!

The type of routine you don't just pick up on!

My fuzzy head was about to spin off my shoulders!

Just when I thought I figured it out so I could repeat on the left side...

I thought wrong!

So much for going in and setting my brain on autopilot as I get a workout!

Smile...pshhh!

The look of horror was more like it!

They were going this way...

I was going that way!

I basically did the "flopping tuna" with a big old helping of jiggle Jell-O 

to go with my humble pie! 

After 20 minutes I was so...umm...

PISSED OFF

humiliated

heartbroken

I left.

To add MORE insult to the insult and injury I already had, 

the child watch lady told me my boys need a lesson in sharing,

and Holden was stewing in a big stinky turd!

I guess now I know the only thing "dancer" about me is my name!

I think it's time to give Cara a call!